It’s been a while since I last talked to you. It seems that I had been TOO BUSY with everything else that I have forgotten you. For that I am sorry.
I would like to express my apologies for not communicating with you for a long while. I know I should’ve sent even a short message a day, but I failed to do even that. Just a small portion of my time and I couldn’t give it to you. I’m sorry. I really do.
Perhaps you are disappointed with me. After all that happened and what we’ve been through, you deserve to hear from me often, and more.
You were always there for me. You always do. Since the beginning, you took care of me – my needs and wants. You showed me that these two things, needs and wants, are of different sphere and that sometimes, they do not coincide. More importantly, you taught me that there are some things that I don’t really “need” and some of my “wants” aren’t what I truly wanted and deserved.
You guided me all the way. You gave me the sense of right and wrong although sometimes I find it difficult to determine which is which. Or even sometimes I know what is right, but couldn’t bring myself to do it. During those hard times, you were there for me.
At times I feel lonely, with no one to give me company, you gifted me with your presence. You made me feel complete in those dim moments in my life.
For those times that I was feeling down and hopeless, you gave me strength to fight every struggle coming my way. You made me realize that I am stronger than those challenges. Indeed, as the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
You were a constant rock who I can always rely on. Even when almost everyone already gave up, you did not. You patiently waited for the positive turn of events. You have faith in me.
Whenever I feel miserable, you made me see all those blessings that I have. Compared to others, my state won’t be classified as miserable. Instead, I feel well endowed.
In those dark days that I feel so ashamed of remembering, you stood by me. You didn’t tolerate nor scold me in my shortcomings. You never uttered I told you so’s. Wordlessly, you righted me in the correct path. With your guidance, I found the right way. I am still far from cat walking in the right path; sometimes I was reeling over the edge. Though now and then it takes long for me to figure it out, I always find ways to go back in the middle of that path and walk with you.
You did all of these to me and much more. And what did I do to show my gratitude? I walked away and forget you. How an ungrateful person I am!
After you help me, I usually rejoice for the solved problem but forget to say my thanks. I know you are good and sure you will forgive that. However, it doesn’t mean that what I always do is right. Far from it. Like different ends of spectrum.
As I write this letter to you, I feel so embarrassed. Not only did I not always express my appreciation, but I sometimes forget your existence whenever everything seems fine. It’s like I only remember you whenever I need help. I’m sorry. Probably you are thinking so low of me now, but I guess that is true.
But I want to change. I really do. Even though it is impossible to repay everything that you have done for me, I want to show you back your kindness and love. Or even go as far as doing kindness to others. I remember a time when I was active doing all those charity and volunteer work. Pay it forward. Extend all those things that you have taught, given, and shown me to other people. Guide them to the right path. Their teacher may be fallible as them, but we can learn together. Hand in hand, we will continue reaching, absorbing, and living your teachings.
I will do all of these and more. Echo how great you are for everything that you did and said. Sing you praises. Soon, everyone will experience and can testify that, indeed, you are the greatest thing that can ever happen in their lives.
Thank you very much JC for continuously believing in me even during those times that I don’t even believe in myself. All those people are correct; You are the only one who can complete a person. You are the only light in those dark times. You are the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Everyone who believes and follows You will find eternal happiness.
I love you. Please stay with me.